20 April, 2006 | Leave a Comment
…just moved out. Yee-ha! I live in student accommodation, though I have my own self-contained flat, thank goodness. My next door neighbour was an embarrassment to all of the Americans living here. The first time I met him, he was wearing a t-shirt that said New York F—kin’ City (without the dashes). Oh, did I mention he’s from Long Island? Is that relevant?
After I saw the t-shirt, I asked him if he actually walked around London wearing it. He said he did and that “people seemed to like it.”
When he first moved in and was lonely, he invited me over to see his new set of kitchenware from Argos. The set contained two egg cups, which he proudly told me were shot glasses. I also got to hear about the reality TV show he was flying to LA to audition for and also about his former girlfriend, the Miami Dolphins cheerleader. (Just imagine me on the receiving end of this conversation.)
Then there was the highlight of his existence, a high-tech computer program that allowed him to connect his computer, via the internet, to his mother’s cable box in NY. With this contraption, he could watch American television in real time, 24/7. He was always bragging about this. I asked him why he even bothered to leave home if he was just going to bring America with him. Unfortunately, my subtly disguised bitchery was lost on him.
Now, I’m not so monstrous as to hate someone simply for being a moron and having bad taste. What disgusted me was that this guy never showed one ounce of consideration for those around him. He is a self-obsessed buffoon who was obviously raised by a pack of howler monkeys at the Bronx Zoo. And sadly, way too many American students I see around here share these same characteristics. In the case of my neighbour, he was almost thrown out of the hall several times because of the loud parties he had in his flat until 4:00 a.m. During the first few months of the fall term, I was kept awake into the wee hours more times than I can count. A few weeks ago, when I was totally swamped with work and had a writing deadline, I woke up to find I had no power in my flat. It seems my neighbour somehow blew out the circuits for the entire floor. This was even worse than the time he plugged an internet phone into the network and caused the internet service to crash – for all 800 residents in the building. And whenever something like this would happen, he’d just laugh. It was all part of his persona as the zany New Yorker.
So when I awoke this morning to find that he had moved out, I was thrilled. I don’t know what happened to him. Maybe he was deported for being a dumbass.
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Josey Says:
April 20th, 2006 at 2:59 amHe doesn’t represent the rest of us americans. I live in the United States and I have the same trouble with idiots like that. They are self centered garbage. Something about the big city makes them act like they are Gods gift to the world. They aren’t worth talking to. If you find yourself in that position again,…avoid them at all cost. Another thing,..if he was living there and was hooked in to his mommy’s house and was going to L.A. for a tv show, it sounds like he was living off of someone elses wallet. They are a joke. I live in the country and I’m not that a way, nor my friends. Come and see for yourself on blogger. Look up josey land.
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Just imagine me on the receiving end of this conversation.
I can only imagine your reaction! Hopefully this “dude” was sent to Guantanamo Bay! I find it mindboggling that he could connect his computer through the internet to his mother’s cable box in NY!!!
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William: When he was telling me about his former girlfriend, I just looked at him in disgust. I didn’t even have to say anything. (And you know how nasty one of my “looks” can be!)
Josey: Perhaps you are right that going abroad somehow exaggerates the negative characteristics of some of these American students. Or maybe I am just overly sensitive to it. But to me, when you are living in a foreign country, you should always be aware of the fact that people are looking at you as an “American.” I think there is some responsibility in that.
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Austrian Says:
May 9th, 2006 at 2:46 pmI wonder if you know that your blog entry above has been used by our English teachers,
to make yesterday’s midterm exam even more difficult than it would have been anyway?!
Did they ask you for permission? *g*greetings from a class of Austrian students of translation and interpretation
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[...] I was recently informed by a student in Austria who is studying English translation that my blog post The Ugly American Next Door appeared on the mid-term exam in their class last week! I think I can safely file this under “surreal.” [...]
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Sorry I’m tuning in late to your blog and this story, but this post just cracks me up! It’s ass&^%*@ like him that make life miserable for the rest of us ex-pats.
Just out of curiousity, how was this post used for an exam?
Salud!
Ms. Glaze -
Ms. Glaze: I ended up writing a longer post about this (16th May). The details of how my post was used are cringe-worthy!
