30 May, 2006 | Leave a Comment
People have recently asked me (and by “people” I mean one of my sex-crazed American friends) whether it’s easy to meet men while living in student housing. After all, I live with literally hundreds of single blokes. I’m sure this sounds like a big swingin’ party, but really, it’s not. The guys in my building seem to fall into three categories:
First, many of them are really young. If they lived in America they could fight in Iraq but not drink. That’s young. And I must admit the young ones just don’t do it for me. I mean, okay, they’re cute in a fresh-faced I just left the farm and I secretly miss my mummy and please give me a hug way, but enough already. If you’ve never plucked a gray hair from your body, I’m not interested.
Second, many of the men living here are from faraway lands. They don’t speak English very well and I suspect a certain percentage of them secretly would like to whisk an English-speaking lass away to their homeland, where they can lock her up in the cellar with their other wives. Um, sounds like a thrill, but I’ll pass.
And last but not least, the guys who look normal but who are actually crazy. And not crazy in a good way. I like guys who are eccentric and quirky and who could have been Edward Scissorhands in a previous life, but not crazy wacko, not “I want to carve your name into my flesh” insane. I know all about this category. This winter I had my own pseudo-stalker in the form of an emotionally unstable PhD student (a redundant description if there ever was one). He has since taken up residence on another continent and was probably escorted there by officials from the Home Office, but really, let’s not dwell on this unpleasant episode. Let’s not!
I’m willing to consider the possibility that there is a fourth, yet uncharted category, but it doesn’t matter. This isn’t the kind of place to meet a mate. When you live in an environment like this, it’s not possible to cultivate an air of mystery, to pique someone’s interest and leave them curious. And unless you work in the sex industry, that’s how things should unfold. But chez moi, it all hangs out. They see you with your shopping and know what kind of toilet paper you buy. Because of the fire drills at odd hours, nearly everyone in this building has seen me in my pajamas with major bedhead. (And I’ve seen them and it wasn’t pleasant.) And just this morning I was doing laundry when the sorta cute and mysterious guy from the third floor suddenly appeared – just in time to see me pulling my purple, tulip-printed underwear from the dryer. And he didn’t even pretend not to see. So now he has seen my underwear but he doesn’t even know my name. This is all backwards. This is wrong! I will never be able to look at him again. Ever. A long hot summer of averted glances has commenced.
On the bright side, only three months left until I leave student housing and become a real adult again…
Anglofille said @ 12:04 am | personal | 8 Comments
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sean Says:
May 30th, 2006 at 12:11 amyou could always use….i don’t know….”THE INTERNET!”….to find one. i think you’re spending too much time in phone booths….;)
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Carol Says:
May 30th, 2006 at 11:22 am“If you’ve never plucked a gray hair from your body, I’m not interested”.
What a fabulous criterion! May I steal it …?
(… although I doubt Jake Gyllenhaal has yet plucked a grey hair from his person, and to rule him out, on that basis, would be pure folly
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Sean: How much time do you spend in phone booths?
Carol: We can exempt celebrities from the Anglofille rule. I’ll allow it.
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sean Says:
May 30th, 2006 at 7:34 pm…long enough not to get caught.
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sean Says:
May 30th, 2006 at 7:35 pm -
Britblog Roundup # 68…
Now that we’re getting into golf scores for the Britblog Roundup we have one that’s a little below par in terms of the number of entries. Must be something to do with spring and young men’s fancies. You can make…
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[...] Turning personal, Anglefille (an American in London) describes why she can’t find a man in the midst of hundreds of them. Mary Bloomington on Putting the Fist in Pacifist meanwhile finds Anti-feminists are just SO ADORABLE sometimes, you could SCREAM. She was responding to the responses to her post on the realities of dating. [...]
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lawe Says:
June 11th, 2006 at 11:57 pmI’m love this great website. Many thanks guy
