22 April, 2007 | Leave a Comment

[Paddington Station]

I’ve already been back in London for one whole week. And what a week it was. You know, I can’t remember the last time I was so happy to be anywhere. I mean really, truly happy. After I move somewhere, I usually feel depressed (sometimes mildly, sometimes in a major way). This is the first time that hasn’t happened to me. I can’t tell you what a relief it is. It’s just further confirmation that my time in France changed me in so many positive ways. I’m approaching life much differently now than when I arrived in London in September 2005. I do feel like a completely new person.

Coming back to this city anew is a real gift. I see everything with fresh eyes. This is the third time I’ve moved to London (the first time was in 1996, when I lived here for a year). I know the honeymoon period won’t last forever, but it’s so lovely. The stupidest things make me happy. For example:

I live on the top floor of my residence and my building is taller than any building I can see from my window. So what do I see when I look outside? Chimneys. Lots of sooty London chimneys. How romantic.

I live on a square that’s off a very busy street. And when I fall asleep at night, I can hear taxi cabs driving down the road, one right after the other. London taxis make a very distinctive sound, much different from other cars. It’s sort of like if cars purred like cats do. Yes, like that. When I’m walking down the street with my back to oncoming traffic, I can always hear when a taxi is approaching. I’m very fond of this sound. At night, it lulls me to sleep.

I also like the smell of the Underground. Unlike in NYC and even Paris, the London Underground does not really smell like garbage and urine. I’m sure there are many stations that do smell this way, but they’re not on my route. The Underground has a distinctive scent, sort of like new car smell mixed with the smell of a train station. It’s sort of a…smoky, musky smell. Do you know what I mean? I like this smell. A lot. (I’m sure it’s probably quite harmful to breathe in!) The scent of the Underground instantly triggers memories of London for me. I’m sure over time this sensation will fade away, but right now it makes me feel giddy. It gives me that “Pinch me, I’m really in London!” feeling.

[If you live in London and you're reading this, you probably think I am the biggest FREAK imaginable. Actually, if you were born and raised in this city, you may never quite understand the bewitching effect London can have on a new arrival, unless you've spent substantial time away from the city and then returned to it. And if you're a person who moved to London at some point in your adult life, your heart is probably so hardened by now that you have forgotten what it's like to be a new arrival. But I bet you can recall that feeling.]

Before you get the wrong impression, I have not spent my first week back just staring at chimneys and listening to taxis and sniffing the Underground. Oh no. I have been a busy bee, busier than I’ve been since leaving Boston. I’m trying to keep up with ye olde blog so my friends and family don’t think I’ve dropped off the face of the earth.

My PhD does not officially resume until mid-May or early June (though I’m spending a lot of time on administrative stuff). But I am involved in another academic pursuit right now. I’d rather not write about it in a specific way until I’m done, but it’s a full-time course that will consume my life for the foreseeable future. As part of this course, I am a student for about five hours a day and a teacher of real live students for two hours. And outside of class, I have homework in the form of essays and lesson planning. On top of this, I have the regular job I do for my American employer. So from the moment I get up in the morning until the moment my head hits the pillow, I am working. Non-stop. On the weekends I have a bit of free time, but not much. Yesterday I managed to take a walk around Hyde Park, but I nearly fell asleep under a tree, like some sort of hobo.

I can’t remember the last time I felt so exhausted! But I’m exhausted in a good way. I’m being pushed to my limits, but I feel invigorated. What makes this grueling course easier is that I like my classmates — they’re all English except for me and one Iranian guy (who, along with the aforementioned rat boy, spends a great deal of his time entertaining me, thank goodness). The class has bonded together in much the same way that hostages do. Having other people to offer support makes the journey much easier. When I finish, it will be a real accomplishment.

This is the first part of the plan I made for my life while in Paris and so far, so good. It’s nice to feel content, for once. I’ve noticed a wonderful change too. I am a notoriously tortured sleeper. I suffer from insomnia quite often, I stay up too late, I can’t get up in the morning, I often have trouble staying asleep during the night. But at least for now, I am no longer plagued with this horrible problem. I eagerly crawl into bed at night, close my eyes and…sleep. Like an angel. For the first time in years.

Yeah, that’s the stuff.

1. Comments RSS

1. jen Says:

   April 22nd, 2007 at 12:09 pm

   (Well, not so sooty chimneys anymore, since many of the original fireplaces are closed off But better air quality so you can *see* the chimneys now!)

   But yeah, returning to the city after an absence is like seeing at all again for the first time. Except better because you remember which way to look crossing the street

2. Mr. X Says:

   April 22nd, 2007 at 3:15 pm

   Glad you’re getting some sleep now, not a lot more important…
   Good to hear you’re feeling happy!!!

3. Ang04 Says:

   April 22nd, 2007 at 4:05 pm

   You are an inspiration for us “older” folks who are having another go at education in the latter part of their lives. (Much older than you). I understand your excitement, and really appreciate your gift of expression.

   Kudos on your living life to the fullest.

4. Lillie Says:

   April 22nd, 2007 at 7:15 pm

   You should treat yourself by visiting some of the smaller museums. I especially love the Geffreye Museum, and their gardens. And the Museum of Childhood is a treat (and both free — I love free)

   I’m so happy that you’re so happy!

5. Silvana Says:

   April 22nd, 2007 at 11:26 pm

   I see you’re back in London town. Cool!
   Good luck with your PhD work

6. rebecca Says:

   April 23rd, 2007 at 5:28 am

   Wow, I was hoping to avoid catered housing but that sounds rather appealing! I’m afraid I might get stuck in some strange form of housing that has to do with my study abroad provider though.

   I’m glad you’re enjoying London again. I’m beginning to wonder how the culture shock cycle actually feels. I guess I’ll know in about 4 months.

7. Anglofille Says:

   April 23rd, 2007 at 8:49 pm

   Thanks for the kind comments everybody! xoxo