31 July, 2008 | 7 Comments

My second MacBook in a week.  I hope this one’s a keeper.

I’ve used one of my Paris sunset photos as my wallpaper.  This view from Pont Neuf always makes me happy.  It calms me down when I’m fretting over not having a right-click on my mouse (arrggghhh!) and searching, fruitlessly, for any sort of delete key.  FN + backspace — that’s it?  Oh, come on!  Is this a British thing or a Mac thing?

It’s really cool, however, to have a built-in webcam and microphone.  It makes Skype calls super fun – no headset!  On the downside, now that people can see me, I have to brush my hair.

29 July, 2008 | 4 Comments

So I bought a new MacBook last week. I was very excited…until the next day, when it started malfunctioning. I would put it to sleep and sometimes it wouldn’t wake up. I couldn’t even get it to turn back on unless I held down the start button for about ten seconds or more and then it lurched and sputtered to life. The computer would behave as if it had crashed and would completely restart. Whatever I had on the desktop was gone. Not only that, but some of the things I had been working on had disappeared…erased…vanished forever into the abyss.

I called tech support and this very sweet Indian guy walked me through all sorts of things, involving unplugging the computer, removing the battery, restarting it, pressing down four keys at once, erasing files, etc. At one point we deleted what I considered to be a rather important system file. The guy told me not to worry, that the Mac would “regenerate” it. I asked him how it was possible for the computer to recreate by itself a file that was damaged and deleted, but he said “that’s the magic of a Mac.” The scary thing is that I think he meant “magic” literally. Creepy.

So after the call with the tech guy (who wasn’t really a tech guy, but just a dude reading out of a manual — by the way, he sounded completely panic-stricken, as if he were a 911 operator and I was bleeding to death) so after I talked to him, the computer worked for a while, then started malfunctioning again. So the next day, I just put the effing thing back in the box and pulled out my Dell. And it stayed in the box all weekend and yesterday.

I planned to return it to the Apple Store today to demand a brand new one. I don’t want it serviced, I want a new one. I erased all the files I had on it, everything I had painstakingly downloaded, etc. And then I waited for the laptop to malfunction again so I could return it to the store in that state. Otherwise, why would they believe me when I tell them it’s not working? So you can probably guess where I’m going with this. The stupid computer won’t malfunction on command. All day I’ve been putting it to sleep and it’s been waking up just fine. I mean, what’s going on? Has it spontaneously healed itself using its magical powers?

Tomorrow it goes back to the shop.

24 July, 2008 | 6 Comments

I’ve not been in a good mood lately, hence the lack of posting. I feel sorta weird, filled with conflicting, often unpleasant emotions and anxieties. I’ve been feeling this way for weeks now and I can’t shake it, so I’ll write about it, even though I don’t think I should.

In the hall of residence where I live, all the students have now left. In the summer, the place fills up with 18-year-old Americans who are on study abroad (more like ‘get drunk abroad’). A great many of the white middle-class American teenagers staying here are ill-mannered barbarians. They are, of course, teenagers. I am a thirtysomething woman and I simply do not want to be literally surrounded by them 24/7.  This is causing a lot of unhappiness in me, which is probably understandable. The group staying on my floor are so loud that I’ve had to relocate to the other side of the building. Whenever I would tell them to be quiet, they would mock me. I would go back to my room and call the security guard. That was the sensible thing to do, because the only other option was screaming at them in a blind, obscenity-filled rage. I decided not to go that route.

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24 July, 2008 | Comments are off

I have to get my MacBook ASAP. Today, Norton Anti-Virus effed with me for the last effing time.

18 July, 2008 | 7 Comments

Today is my sister’s b-day. Happy Birthday! You know you’re old when your younger sister is 33. Crap.

Sis wanted Victorian taxidermy for her birthday, but that’s a little out of my price range, so an Amazon gift certificate it is. I know this isn’t as good as a stuffed dead animal, so to quell the disappointment, on my way home I stopped at Peyton and Byrne and bought her some porn. If your sister can’t buy you porn for your birthday, then no one can. Click below to see it, but only if you’re over 18.

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18 July, 2008 | 4 Comments

Just when I begin to worry that too many of my fellow Americans have lost their minds, Jon Stewart saves the day.

Obama’s campaign responded to the NY’er cover by calling it “tasteless and offensive.” Jon Stewart thinks they should have responded like this:

“You know what your response should’ve been? It’s very easy: Barack Obama is in no way upset about the cartoon that depicts him as a Muslim extremist. Because you know who gets upset about cartoons? Muslim extremists! Of which Barack Obama is not. It’s just a f*cking cartoon!”

See the whole video here. The joke about Wolf Blitzer is a must-see…

16 July, 2008 | 7 Comments

tomorrow i leave for the south of france. call me crazy, but i figure if i can get the first photos of knox and viv, then i’ll be able to pay off my student loans and buy my own flat and stuff. fingers crossed.

For my Democrat readers: Please note this post contains no satire, irony or wit. There’s nothing to offend you here. Please move along.

15 July, 2008 | 3 Comments

Yesterday, I wrote about how Obama considers it a smear when people say he’s a Muslim. Well, above you can see the proof, taken directly from Obama’s official website. “The smear” is that “Barack Obama is secretly a Muslim.” You’ll notice it doesn’t say “Muslim extremist” or “Muslim fundamentalist.” It just says “Muslim.”

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14 July, 2008 | 3 Comments

Obama’s campaign responds to the controversial New Yorker cover that has everyone buzzing today: “The New Yorker may think, as one of their staff explained to us, that their cover is a satirical lampoon of the caricature Sen. Obama’s right-wing critics have tried to create. But most readers will see it as tasteless and offensive. And we agree.”

Oh, boo hoo!

From ABC News: “This is as offensive a caricature as any magazine could publish,” says a high-profile Obama supporter, “and I suspect that other Obama supporters like me are also thinking about not subscribing to or buying a magazine that trafficks in such trash.”

Trash? Liberal bloggers are also frothing at the mouth, which is beyond disappointing…and just a bit scary. Here’s an idea: Why don’t you all get a big bonfire going and burn every issue of The New Yorker you can find. I’m sure the Republicans have some lighter fluid you can borrow.

It’s not surprising that HRH Obama and his media supporters are upset about the cover. Most of the liberal media have their noses shoved so far up Obama’s ass that they haven’t seen sunlight in months. How dare the New Yorker publish a provocative, satirical image of the Obamas! We can’t have any sort of intellectual culture in America! Americans are just too stupid for that! Everything must be dumbed-down to a Fox News level of good vs. evil stupidity. The New Yorker’s editors’ attempts to defend the cartoon and justify it are highly disappointing. No no no! Just shut up, you bunch of weenies. Stand up to the Obama machine by waving the Constitution in their faces.

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14 July, 2008 | 2 Comments

I went to see this film, which is the true story of Barbara Daly Baekeland, who married the heir to the Bakelite plastics fortune. The morally bankrupt American socialite’s big claim to fame was having an incestuous relationship with her homosexual son and then being murdered by him. I’m pretty sure the subtitle of this film is, “Be grateful your family isn’t this crazy.”

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12 July, 2008 | 3 Comments

“Few men since Flaubert have offered such sympathy to women whose lives are hell.”

–Kurt Vonnegut on The Easter Parade

I stayed up until 5:00 this morning to finish reading this novel. This is a big deal, since I haven’t been able to read a novel since returning from my trip. I start books, then abandon them. I also haven’t been writing. It’s been a rough few weeks.

The Easter Parade affected me in a powerful way, which was a bit of a shock, actually. As I was reading it, I was pulled along, but the characters started to get on my nerves. It’s the story of two sisters, Sarah and Emily. Though it’s a short novel, it spans about 40 years, from the 1930s to the 1970s. Yates is a master realist and we mainly get various episodes of the sister’s lives, primarily Emily’s life. Sarah’s life is truly heartbreaking, though you don’t know it until you’re deep into the novel. The story is told mostly from Emily’s perspective and focuses a great deal on her heavy drinking and many love affairs. After a while, it was like — Okay, we get it. You’re a drunk and you like to sleep around! I was getting annoyed with the repetitiveness of it.

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11 July, 2008 | 1 Comment

It has a fabulous first line:

“Neither of the Grimes sisters would have a happy life, and looking back it always seemed that the trouble began with their parents’ divorce.”

–The Easter Parade by Richard Yates

10 July, 2008 | 7 Comments

Literary blogs are buzzing this week with the news that Jhumpa Lahiri has won the Frank O’Connor short story prize — a major literary award worth £27,000. The fact that she won isn’t surprising, but what’s making news is that the judges announced they will not produce a shortlist of books that will compete for the top prize, as is the norm. No, they’ve bypassed the shortlist and just given the award to Lahiri for her new collection, Unaccustomed Earth. Apparently, no one could match her brilliance, so why bother having a shortlist. This means that the writers who would have gotten valuable media exposure from being on the shortlist will now get nothing. The judges claim they didn’t want to put other writers through the stress and suspense of being shortlisted, when it was a foregone conclusion that Lahiri would win. As if anyone on the shortlist would have been stupid enough to think they were going to win with Lahiri there. At least they could have gotten a little publicity for their work, which is important given that short stories are largely ignored by readers and the media nowadays — those short stories not written by Lahiri, that is.

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8 July, 2008 | 3 Comments

From a Telegraph article titled: Toddlers who dislike spicy food ‘racist’:

“Toddlers who turn their noses up at spicy food from overseas could be branded racists by a Government-sponsored agency.”

I honestly don’t think it’d be possible to make this stuff up.

8 July, 2008 | 1 Comment

Courtesy of William, who is dismayed that it now costs $70 (£35) to fill up his jeep with gasoline:

“I’m still floored by how much it cost to fill my tank…And we’re spending hundreds of billions of dollars to fight that war in Iraq and we can’t get any of the oil? Isn’t this why we went over there?”

Excuse me while I wipe the tears from my eyes. I haven’t laughed this hard in ages.

6 July, 2008 | 7 Comments

Waterloo Sunset: After the Rain

Today is my friend Anita’s 50th birthday. Anita, I wanted to take a photo of a brilliant Waterloo Sunset for you on your birthday — with a bright sky and yellow rays of light. As you can see, Mother Nature offered something slightly more gothic. [I actually went to the bridge last night as well, just as an insurance policy, but the sun was not even visible at all. It may be summer...but this is London!] It had been raining earlier this evening, as you can see, but the storm passed around the time of the sunset. I’ve called this After the Rain, because I think it’s an apt metaphor for what this birthday means for you.

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4 July, 2008 | 6 Comments

It’s the 4th of July, but I don’t feel like celebrating. Right now I’m too ashamed to be an American.

I’ve been reading about the case of LaVena Johnson, which is making the rounds in the blogosphere and left-wing media. Who is LaVena Johnson? From Salon’s blog:

In July 2005, 19-year-old Johnson became the first female soldier from Missouri to die in Iraq. She was found with a broken nose, black eye and loose teeth, acid burns on her genitals, presumably to eliminate DNA evidence of rape, a trail of blood leading away from her tent and a bullet hole in her head. Unbelievably, that’s not the most horrifying part of the story. Here’s what is: Army investigators ruled her death a suicide.

This article by Ann Wright details much more extensively the injuries Johnson suffered and how it is impossible for her to have killed herself. Johnson’s death was initially ruled a homicide, then quickly changed to suicide. The case is closed. This young woman volunteered to serve in Iraq. In return, she was beaten, raped, mutilated, murdered and set on fire by other soldiers. Rather than bringing her killers to justice, her superiors and by extension the government of the United States is complicit in her rape and savage killing. Is this what America stands for? And to think, we’re in Iraq now to bring the people democracy and teach them how to be “civilized.”

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